So, Lincoln up next...

[Bare Ben]

Without meaning to start this up again, I know what winding-up is, hell i'm the master of it, but I will never accept that repeatedly calling someone a bully can be dismissed as a "wind-up". So yes, certainly lessons to be learned. Let's draw a line under it.

I'm going 4-0 and another Jevo hat-trick. Drummond with the other.

Att: 2123 (it's really cold at the moment)

[shrimpnsave]

Damn, I was looking forward to an 80 style dance off.

third from the right...third from the left(just to be clear)

who is that??????????????

[Joelinho]

Damn, I was looking forward to an 80 style dance off.

third from the right...third from the left(just to be clear)

who is that??????????????

Zanetti number 8, Batistuta in the middle and Veron on the other side

[Bare Ben]

Looks like Gucci to me...

[morecambe mick]

Looks like Gucci to me...

When "dance off" was mentioned I thought straight away of you Ben

[Sammy h]

Looks like Gucci to me...

When "dance off" was mentioned I thought straight away of you Ben

Ben has no dance moves what so ever. When it comes to dancing....

[Bare Ben]

Looks like Gucci to me...

When "dance off" was mentioned I thought straight away of you Ben

Ben has no dance moves what so ever. When it comes to dancing....

This is true, Mick was referring to a joke I told on saturday Sam, but your statement is valid only because your moves are so mesmerizing.

[Curly]

Talking of wind ups, hope they bring their air raid siren
and hope they still get allowed in with it

[essex_shrimp]

3-1 Duffy Man of the Match

Lincoin boss knows the league well under Southend when he had no cash and did a good job.

but morecambe still will get third place

[morecambe mick]

You said it was a joke before you told us Ben......

The bus just turned cold. No laughter, except you of course

[Sammy h]

You said it was a joke before you told us Ben......

The bus just turned cold. No laughter, except you of course

Sounds familiar Mick

Always laughing at his own jokes.

[Bare Ben]

Oh yeah because you two never laugh at them please climb out of my arse.

[matty]

hell i'm the master of it

You're good, but lets not get giddy.

[shrimpnsave]

4-0

or 4-1

[RedRedWine1]

Morecambe 3-1 Lincoln City, Jevons brace followed by a Brown thunderbolt, crowd of 2,300 (200 away fans).

Sammy sets up with his new best friend, the 4-4-2 formation. Stanley steps up to take a corner. He pauses. He Strokes his travellers haircut. He Shuffles ominously towards the ball. He delivers a pinpoint cross to the other touchline, where it is met by Duffs who glides in a toe-neb for Jevons. A curling rasper is sent hurtling goalwards like an anaemic banana, taking a slight deflection from a distraught keepers cupped hands before nestling in the net. Goal goal goal goal!!!! Bare Ben is kissed by Happy Harry in all the pandemonium.

The Morecambe fans go wild, like the Catherine wheels that would be so much better if they were only deployed on Morecambe prom. Local Photography Enthusiasts of Recreational Ventures (PERVs for short) take note of this, writing letters to local civil servants. LCC staff take a break from snoozing on lazyboy recliners, fobbing off hardworking citizens, and generally being inefficient, to create a poll and garnish feedback to these proposals. They decide not to go ahead after all, despite everybody on shrimpsvoices and hence the world agreeing that it is a good idea . All documentation is used as kindling when the Tory party deploys a cost cutting exercise in which local councils are told explicitly to stop burning money.

Half-time arrives and Bill Oddie wins open the box. A keen bird watcher, Oddie had randomly decided to take in a game in between twitching on the bays glistening mud-flaps. Uncle Ken keeps going on about exotic Thai birds, Oddie doesn't know what he is going on about but agrees to film and narrate it. Ken and Bills Thai bird adventures is the number one Christmas stocking filler in the resort, available from all good shops and some rubbish ones as well. Also during the break, Local students go on an enforced hunger strike due to the lack of pies and the outrageous suggestion that perhaps they should make a higher contribution towards attaining psychology degrees that will ultimately see them continuing to clean-up from the state. Ordinary tax payers pelt them with cold brown water that is being passed off as gravy in the MBW. One student actual gets hit by a hot slither and suffers slight scolding, lucky bastard.

Back to the game, Jevons rounds the keeper for his second and then neatly lays off Brown who belts the shrimps third from distance. Feeling confident, Sammy brings on Capalidi in the dying moments of the game. Capaldi neatly passes to Roche's empty net to complete the scoring and end a fascinating match. Capaldi is knighted for his services to football and given a share of the Champagne sections nibbles in the bar after the match.

Applause abounds throughout the stadium for the new scoreboard, a fitting tribute to one taken, but whose name will now follow us up the leagues.

Up the Shrimps.

[marky No.1]

Crowd then reduces by 300 as they know what's going to happen and the rest get pissed on Red Red Wine .

Quite apt really as we went to a UB 40 concert on Sunday

[Sammy h]

Have you met HH yet Ben?