A Christmas tale

[Bare bum]

Many years ago when we lived in Silverdale and the children were all very young a friend and I employed a man from the street in Kendal. He was offering himself for gorillagrams, dressing up at Christmas parties, pranks, anything in fact.
We arranged to meet at Eaves wood car park the night before Christmas Eve where he was to turn up in a Santa costume. We brought a hessian sack with some small gifts. The plan was to install him up in the woods, concoct a story for the 7 children who lived on our lane, that Santa had clipped a tree and had put down for some minor repairs and let his reindeer graze out the back and he had agreed to say hello. We accompanied the man up into the woods to the witches house (an old ruin) and proceeded to knock in half a dozen stakes around the house and lit the petrol soaked rags tied round their ends (flaming torches). I hadn't really noticed that he had sat still and become very quiet, whilst we were busy with the torches. When we told him we were going to fetch the kids he said
"You're going to kill me aren't you?".

Anyway, I lost control in hysterical laughter we eventually placated him and the performance all went off perfectly. The kids all remember him as the real Father Christmas and my Joe can remember seeing the sled sparking over the Scots Pines before it tumbled.

So, I was telling the story (again) yesterday to my partners family and her mother (a sweet and richly accented Irish lady who some of you know) lent to me and said "Did you burn him?" ........................... I thought she said something weird so I said "sorry Margaret, what?" she lent closer and said again "Did you burn him?"
What sort of family have I got myself involved in here?

[marky No.1]

Don't know but it sounds like they must be related to mine!